Holy Fuck Me

So...
After coming off the high of acquiring the aforementioned Tool tickets my girlfriend and the couple we are going to Tool with took a ride into NYC. Our primary objective was to see Bodies: The Exhibition, a friend's new apartment with a great penthouse view and balcony, grab a bite and be on the 10:40pm train home.

At noon that day, it was raining and cold; a plain old miserable day. We somehow managed to get our shit together and catch the 12:30 train in. As we walked into Grand Central Terminal, a friend of ours was standing there in wait, we'll call him Bormanus. He successfully coerced us to accompany him to a nearby bar, Casey O'Fucksuck's or something like that. Two or three beers, and one bizarre conversation with some Irish bastard on the rules of baseball, we managed to get ourselves back on track and headed for the Bodies ordeal.

Bodies... Well, bodies was pretty fucked up. The air was hot and smelled peculiar, and there were grotesquely dissected bodies every-fucking-where. To be honest, the first few areas got to me. Exposed muscles, often filleted, internal organs, skin, etc. All standing there with the same stare of a mass murderer. I pretty much had had enough of the thing when I saw a skeleton holding hands with the muscles that used to surround it. However, the circulatory and fetus section were fucking awesome and make the visit very worthwhile.

Friend's apartment... The view was excellent, right in Hell's Kitchen. Stunning. Then we decided to grab a bite. So we now have the four original members plus another girl and her very odd brother. Fast forward. The restaurant had, flat out, the worst service I have ever experienced. Everyone ordered a ton of food, and ate less than half of it; it made me kinda sick. We headed to the train.

The best part... 25 minutes into our journey from Grand Central to CT, as we sat in the bar car sprawled out with no more than 4 other people in the car, a fucking crash and sparks to high hell occurred all around us. The fucking train driver-guy somehow managed to catch the arms that make contact with the electrical lines overhead and rip the fuckers right off the top of the train. We are now stopped. With nothing more than emergency battery-powered lights. I wish I could explain the gradual transition from joking and silliness all the way to fucking infuriation. I can't do the story justice, and you all probably wont care to read the whole boring story, just know that after leaving NYC at 10:40 on train with an arrival time of 11:30 we managed to crawl the way home by around 2:00am. I love having to be at work four and a half hours after going to bed.

Fuck Metro-North railroad. Fuck 'em. Fuck 'em right in the eye

Miserable

It has been that kind of weekend. Lotta rain, lotta shit, lotta rain and shit. No worries though, for me it's been a Konami kind of weekend. Metal Gear has been my crack for the past 2 days and I have blasted through a couple of games in the series. I am moving on to Castlevania now though (another good rainy day game).

However, my DVD collection has not been cutting it as of late. But good news for me and everyone else, Rescue Me Season 2 is being released in a few weeks. A sweet season for a superb series. Better still, Season 3 will be starting Tuesday May 30th on FX. If you have not checked this series out you were dropped as a baby.

I am in a food mood right now... So have some other stuff to fuck around with.
HK Cafe
I'm Lovin It!

You can share the world with me. They can't stop you. Strike now - pick up a sharp thing and stab, or a heavy thing and crush, that's all. That will make you free. Anyone can do it.

Fuck Yeah!!!

Just wanted to brag that I got 2 tickets to the Tool show in New York City. My friend was also able to get two, so we are all good. The show sold out in minutes. The best thing about it is that it is a tiny venue, very intimate, something that is a rarity for Tool (I have seen them at MSG, Continental Airlines Arena, Nassau Colleseum, etc). A reserve of tickets may be released through Ticketmaster for the sold-out shows in Boston and Philly, keep checking the site. Until thenm A preemptive Happy Birthday to me.


"If I had a hole in my neck I'd put pennies in it."

Pointless Post

Why are we catering to these people?

Coolest Gadget Ever
-Too bad Miller beer will be the first to use it. It couldn't be a fucking good beer could it?

Why would the blind want to see. Most blind people look peculiar.

Another reason to get XM: Patrice O'Neill will be hosting his own radio show regarding "relationships." O'Neill's take on male-female relations is, well, not supportive. If you have a relationship problem, he will more than likely make you want to end the relationship; but when you kick the bitch out (or in women's cases, the piece-of-shit bastard) you'll be laughing like a man watching an unwanted baby being aborted. The show will air Thursday nights from 9pm - 12am EST on XM channel 202 (I am awaiting confirmation of the day and time).

"You know what I haven't had in a while?"
"Big-League Chew."

Free Radio

It has been announced in the press, and confirmed by Opie and Anthony on this morning's show, that the O&A show will be aired on broadcast radio; nearaly four years since they were fired for the Sex for Sam show. Word has it that they will be filling the slot currently being held by David Lee Roth, who had taken over the time period that Howard Stern formerly aired. A few things to help you out:

David Lee Roth is a singer, and that's the only way he should be broadcast.
Howard Stern is a liar and a fraud.
O&A party rock

Krinkle Krinkle

E-mail Post

Apparently I can post via email. We can find out together how that works.

 

Also, several of you have complained about making comments. I have changed it so that anyone should be able to post a comment, just put in a fake email if you are a paranoid fuck.

 

Abortions Tickle!

Tool in NYC?

So after reading the best source for Tool news on the internet I was led to believe that the only shows accessible from the NY metropolitan area would be in Philly and Boston. It turns out they have announced 2 shows (the 19th and 20th) in New York City at the City Center. Tickets will not be available through Ticketmaster for these shows, but rather through the venue's box office. Ticket will go on sale at 11:00am on Saturday the 22nd of April. You can order tickets by calling (212) 581-1212. There is a 2 ticket limit, which is unfortunate since I have 2 other people that will be accompanying me for whom this will be their first live Tool experience. It looks like I will have to stick to my original plan to go to the Philly show on the 17th of May. I would really love to go to the NYC show, since it is a lot closer. However, I cannot be responsible for preventing anyone from experiencing these ethereal performances. Wish me luck, and if you want to do me a huge favor, let me know if you can sacrifice yourself to get me that elusive 3rd ticket for NYC. Otherwise, look for me at the Philly show.

Sorry, I am on a serious Tool kick. The album, scheduled for release May 2nd has been leaked. I have had the pleasure of listening to it and, as is the usual with new Tool CD's, it will take most listeners several listens for much of the CD to be appreciated, and beloved. I refuse to tell anyone where to get the leaked copy, buy it on May 2nd; I know I will.

Liberate Tutume Ex Infernis

Finally! Event Horizon is released in this 2-Disc Special Edition DVD. Overall reviews look solid if you like the flick to begin with. The transfer has been improved over the initial bare-bones release among other things. The audio options are listed as the same on both versions, but some sites have declared this copy as crisper. And disc 2 has a bunch to offer for the hardcore.

While not the most elaborate SE, this is miles better than the original release. I am still trying to flush my old copy down the shitter. For around $13 she's a steal in my opinion.


If you're going through hell, keep going.

Halle-fucking-luja

Sorry to keep inundating you with TOOL material, but I have to write about it since I am excited as hell about their new album and forthcoming tour.
Initially it was thought that they would tour Europe this summer followed by a US tour. This may still be the case, but they have decided to satisfy fanatics like myself by announcing several US dates during may, prior to the European leg of the tour. Only about 8 dates have been announced for the US, most notably headlining the Coachella festival outside of Los Angeles. What has given me an erection, however, are the shows announced for Philadelphia and Boston. Since I despise Massachusettes drivers I will be at the Philly show on May 17th, however the Boston show works better for my schedule (fucking christ). Tickets for most of these US dates go on sale this saturday, April 22nd. Get them while they last. If I fail to acquire tickets you will be entertained by what will likely be a long and furious post about how much Ticketmaster blows; i.e. good for you, fucking tragic for me... so don't fucking laugh.

TOOL -> 'Vicarious'

Here is my review of the first song to be released from the new Tool CD, "10,000 Days" entitled 'Vicarious.'

It fucking rocks!

That is all

My Body Aches

So last night I went out with my girlfriend and another couple. It was the other girl's (link coming soon) birthday. I was the designated driver, thus I had little to drink. The ladies, on the other hand, achieved a level of fucked-uppedness that I have rarely seen (link coming soon). Maybe I'll post some pics. After 5 hours of sleep I was back at work, for once I was happy that I didn't get drunk. My body fucking hurts like bloody hell, I can't wait to start drinking.

In other, far more pressing, news; The first single from the new TOOL CD, "Vicarious" has leaked (official release date is April 17th). I haven't heard it yet, I'm sure it's fucking amazing. I'm usually a freak for getting albums prior to the release date, but with TOOL I always pay for the CD; they are too fucking good to steal from. Besides, their cover art is second to none. Other little tidbits about a US tour have come to light, hopefully preceeding their European tour later this summer. Find more here.



Coming Attractions....

A little pain

More coming later. Take this!

I meant to update this a while ago. My fucking monitor died, thus no computing at home (I am updating from work). It's ok, I ordered a new one from www.newegg.com and it should be here by the end of the week. It's gonna be sweet. 20+ inches of widescreen delight.

Another useless USB device

I don't have enough to start a new post, so I will just continue to update this one.

A couple more useless USB dingys
Balloon?
Football?

A Little Color

There is a lot of talent out there. The very sick mastermind Edmund Mcmillen (responsible for www.thisisacryforhelp.com) has a spin off site and company. Gone are the days of dead baby jokes, dead baby dress-ups, and fun things to do with dead babies. *sob*

However, this guy is still skilled and is focusing his attention to flash games and even an online comic. His worlds are unique and his art style reminds me of that book "Where the Wild Things Are"...but with more blood, puss, slime, death, cannibals and what not. So grab your family and check out Diverge now!

Some other dope sites:
Epicenter for the coolest digital and traditional art on the web.
Deaddreamer for the chance to meet a god.

Ninjas!

Whats up all? Thought I would bring some flavor to this tool box. Well, not really, but something different nonetheless. I plan to ravage everyone here with well known/middle known/little known media sites but who knows...

Now, I thought THIS was a sweet (old) web movie, but when I showed the trailer to my dad...he kicked me in the balls. I have not read up on the FACTS, but they always count for something.

Monday's Fucking Suck

It's kinda worse to know that its gonna suck, rather than be surprised by it sucking

So I'm back from my vacation to my couch, and work is starting to look like it might suck for a while. Nonetheless, I felt like posting a bunch of garbage to make me feel better about myself. One of the few high points of my day was recieving my new shirt from www.tshirthell.com, you can see it HERE . Let's see... well, here are a few links to keep whoever is dumb enough to read this page:
I should really start focusing on making this blog about useless USB devices
In fact. I'll post a few to get started:
George Foreman Grill
Slippers
Flower Pot?
Gloves
My Personal Favorite

I'll keep those coming. I'm sure if you explore the sites I linked you'll be able to find some other nonsense.
THIS can't be real. Imagine if that could happen in this country... Utopia!
In case you missed it the other night, HERE is the Simpson's Movie trailer.

I think I'll wrap this up for now, my attention span has been far exceeded.